Thursday, January 6, 2011
Recently, I told someone that I wanted to buy cuter casual clothes so I could look nice for hubby when he came home for work. "I'm tired of looking frumpy," I said.
"Don't bother. It won't work," she replied.
I didn't say anything, but I thought she meant I shouldn't bother because nothing could help me look less frumpy. Then I decided to think the best, let it go and not worry about what she meant.
I found out this week that she had done the same thing about her clothes six months ago, but her husband didn't like the casual pants and tees she had bought. He liked her to be a little more dressy. So what she said had nothing at all to do with me. It was all about herself and her husband.
I am glad I didn't take offence or think the worst. I think we all occasionally misconstrue what people say. In fact, a friend told me today she was insulted when she invited a couple to dinner and the woman said, "Joe wants to know what you are serving for dinner." My friend was surprised, but answered, "Chicken." "Oh, that's fine then," the woman replied. My friend believed the husband wouldn't come if dinner wasn't something he wanted. But I thought maybe he has allergies and his wife just omitted that fact.
I used to follow a site on Facebook called, Zoomers. There were quite a few misunderstandings on that site. People seemed to think the worst about what someone had written.
I think the safest course is to first think the best about the other person, ask them to explain further if it is important to you, or decide to just forget the whole thing.